I moved aside to let another shopper pass through a narrow aisle. After we exchanged pardons and thanks, the customer turned back to say, “By the way, that’s a great coat you’re wearing!”

It was the kind of unexpected compliment that left me smiling and standing a little taller.

In the right context, friendly words from strangers can bring a surprising amount of cheer.

And, of course, those words are at their best when nothing is expected in return.

I recently saw a movie in the theater. Afterwards — I don’t know why — I looked up some of the critical reviews.

Sure enough, it was a mixed bag. Some viewers enjoyed it while others assailed it as predictable and obvious.

It’s a good reminder: we’re all seeking different things.

One moviegoer might be hoping for a plot that’s nuanced, complicated, and filled with twists. Another might seek what’s charming, familiar, and light. One might seek a well-worn genre while another might seek the unconventional.

Much of it has to do with our own tastes and expectations.

Unsurprisingly (or at least it should be unsurprising) our opinions are not always shared by others … even when we’re certain we’re right.

Sports fans love to see their favorite teams win.

But above all, we want to see a good game.

The best wins aren’t the lopsided blowouts; they’re the nail-biting, last-second, hard-fought victories.

Thrilling. Satisfying. Memorable.

We can seek to live our lives — or at least parts of our lives — in the same way. Not choosing the paths without friction, but instead seeking an appropriate level of challenge and adversity.

Set yourself up for some good wins. More specifically, embrace the kind of adventures that have the possibility of delivering either a win or a loss. Victories under those circumstances are especially sweet.

Some of us are quicker to look at a notification on a mobile device than we are to notice a person entering the room.

The world is full of notifications and distractions. It’s up to us to prioritize the signals that matter.

Because not everything that dings and blings is worthy of our attention.

Anyone can rock the boat. On the other hand, it takes skill to stand at the helm and navigate.

Making waves is not the challenge. It’s more about the kind of waves you’re going to make.

So make ripples and waves. But don’t settle for being an aimless agitator. Be a skipper.

Don’t draw because the world needs another drawing (it doesn’t). Don’t draw because it’s the most efficient (it’s not).

Draw because it connects your hand and your eye. Draw because it’s a way of engaging with the visual world. Draw because it fosters an intimacy with what you see — with your eyes and in your mind. Draw because it’s an extraordinary form of communication.

It’s not about line and tone and skill and beauty … as much as it is about you seeing more deeply and more clearly.

Choosing the work is more effective than choosing the reward.

When we seek an à la carte way of living, it’s important to understand which parts of the menu we can order and influence, and which parts are outside of our control.

If you prompt someone to generate an idea of their own, offering an example is tempting.

But don’t.

Examples offer a way forward. They supply a viable solution. But they can also create an anchor. That is, the example becomes a kind of home base: “What can I think of that rhymes with the example?”

During the quiet moment when you ask someone to think of something, and they don’t respond … just sit with that moment. Hold that tension. Allow ideas to form. Encourage them to form.

But hesitate to give the example in your mind. Voicing the example shrinks the world of possibilities to a mere window of possibilities.

Instead, let the idea generation happen, even if it takes time. Even if the thinking portion is painfully awkward.

Let the process unfold. You might be surprised by the potential discovery.

The ampersand (&) evolved from a combination of the letters et — the Latin word for “and”.

The symbol dates back to the first century. In some versions, you can still identify the different parts of each letter.

Some things have been together so long that we forget how they came to be, or that they were ever anything else. Knowing their history, however, can add to our appreciation when they’re put to use.

Every so often, it’s good to step back from your hopes, desires, goals, and dreams.

Ask yourself, “Are these my own?”

If the answer is a resounding yes, then you’re good to go.

But if you find that you’re chasing a dream that’s not yours — perhaps it belongs to your friends, your colleagues, your neighbors, or popular culture — then you might have some thinking to do.

Follow your dreams; just make sure they’re yours.

A friend tells this story about a company where he used to work:

“I went into the room where we were supposed to have the Board of Directors meeting, and someone had removed all the chairs. Purposely. We were finished in thirty minutes. It was the most efficient board meeting we ever had.”

* * *

When we’re uncomfortable — or just not too comfortable — we have a way of stripping away the fluff and getting down to business.

Mick and Keef could get plenty of satisfaction.

They just couldn’t keep it.

That’s the challenge for any of us.

Not getting it, but keeping it.

* * *

H/T Arthur C. Brooks

Pause. Look around you.

This is your life. This … is your life.

It’s not what was in the past.

It’s not what you’ve planned for the future.

It is what is now. Nothing less. Nothing more.

Lean in. Appreciate. Live. Love.

And if you seek change, change what’s now.

The past is fixed and the future is as unknown as it is unpredictable.

Focus on the now; now is your life.

There are more opportunities to become farmers than there are to become monarchs.

* * *

Sometimes we look at the fruits of someone’s labor and we think, “I want that too!”

But owning the harvest without working the fields … that model, with good reason, is rare.

“I want what they have” or “I want their luck” is an in-actionable perspective.

If instead, we pair wanting with working, we can move toward our goals.

We begin not with scepters, but with shovels and rakes.

A trusted adviser once encouraged me to ask my children, “When do you feel special?”

It’s the kind of question that — depending on the answer — could reveal quite a lot.

It can be a challenging question to field if one hasn’t given it much consideration, or if “feeling special” is unfamiliar territory.

Either way, the question is not just useful for children; it’s useful for adults, too.

How about you? When do you feel special?

In your personal practices — every so often — pick a superlative and see what happens.

Biggest. Smallest. Farthest. Fastest. Loudest. Thriftiest. Most elaborate.

It’s a different way of exploring new goals. When you approach the largest canvas you’ve ever worked with, or the shortest composition, or the longest run — but you release other typical expectations, like “best” or “quickest” or “most profitable” — then you’re able to build out a little island of safe experimentation.

Of the many knobs available, find just one and push its limit. See what you can learn.

How we deal with disappointment is often a reflection of our character.

What kind of emotions rise to the surface when you’re disappointed? More importantly, what do you do with them?

We can learn a lot about people by watching what they do when they’re disappointed. We can learn a lot about ourselves, too.

Look back. What went well? What didn’t? What did you learn?

Look forward. What do you want? What do you hope? What will you seek? What’s your plan?

* * *

What are you asking of this year?

Even more: What is it asking of you?

If you’re planning to begin a new habit tomorrow, don’t wait.

Do it today.

There’s tradition around New Year’s resolutions, but there’s power in being able to change your habits today, no matter where today is on the calendar.

Why not begin now?

If you can’t cook, maybe you can set the table. Or perhaps you can wash the dishes.

And if you can’t do those things, you might try to engage in a pleasant conversation.

A lack of ability or opportunity in one area doesn’t relegate you to idleness.

Seek to contribute. Even more, seek to be a contribution.