If there’s little surprise in your day, it might be because you’re not taking any risks.
For a person whose livelihood relies on compliance and following directions, risk avoidance is wise.
But if you’re responsible for bringing creativity to the world, risk is a good thing, and surprise can be a touchstone.
Some kitchen cabinets hide little sins: old, metal containers of well-expired, dried spices.
The unfortunate thing is that spices are intended to add special flavor.
If you go to the trouble of adding a little extra something — “spicing things up” or adding a unique twist — don’t reach for what has expired. Use quality ingredients. Quality materials.
And, of course, this goes well beyond cooking.
Sometimes (or maybe often) there’s a gap between the way things are, and the way we want them to be.
Our home, versus the home we want to occupy.
Our bank account, versus the bank account we seek to have.
Our résumé, versus the résumé we hoped to have built.
Our respect among peers, versus the respect we think we deserve.
Our physical appearance, versus the way we want to look.
When these disparities occur, it’s no use loathing the gap.
If it’s that important, we should work to intentionally narrow the gap by working purposefully toward our goals.
But in some cases — particularly in areas where we have no control — we should consider eliminating the gap entirely by adopting an attitude of contentment… living fully in the present, with acceptance, and a spirit of gratitude.
The first day in April is often filled with pranks and jokes. And if we happen to remember the occasion, we’re a little more suspicious on April Fools’ Day. We expect some lighthearted gags and high jinks, and we’re on the lookout.
But with the prevalence of scams and phishing schemes, it seems like we’re already on the lookout year round. Do I open that email? Do I click on that hyperlink? Is the person on the phone who they say they are? Is this a trick?
It’s a sad reality. However, in a culture of widespread scams and deceit, individuals and businesses who are honest, trustworthy, and who aim to be virtuous... they’re more valuable than ever. For us, it’s an opportunity to shine.
When it comes to creative work, obsession can be a good thing. Drive. Grit. Commitment.
And after the project is complete, it can often be satisfying to stand back from the work and to admire what we’ve accomplished.
But we have to limit the staring.
It’s quite possible to get stuck admiring what we’ve done. But don’t be tempted into complacency.
We have to move on to the next great thing we will do.
Let others do the admiring while we get back to work.
When you agree to satisfy a request, you can say, “Yes, I’ll do that.”
You can also say, “Yes, I’ll do that. Here are all the special arrangements I’ll make in order to meet your request...”
And then you can explain the logistics, how you’ll coordinate the details, and the scheduling changes that will be required.
That second method is cousin to giving someone a gift and then telling them how much you paid for it.
Don’t list your efforts as though you’re investing in the level of anticipated thanks.
Most of the time, it’s best to just give the gift.
Every friendship takes a unique journey. Sometimes contact is frequent. Sometimes there are quiet spells. There are ups and there are downs.
But where there is relationship... where there’s a desire for connection... where there is love… good friends pick up right where they left off.
Time becomes fluid and fond memories from years ago feel like they were made yesterday.
Laugh. Cry. Laugh until you cry, and embrace those friendships as the precious gifts that they are.
If a task is really hard, it could be that you require preternatural strength, skill, and determination.
But it’s also possible that you’re doing it the wrong way.
Sure, some things are impossibly difficult. But there are also times when we push on a pull door... and we’re so absorbed with applying effort that we fail to step back and reevaluate.
When you’re in a pool of light surrounded by darkness... maybe you’re not under an interrogation lamp.
Maybe it’s not a searchlight.
Maybe it’s a spotlight, and it’s your turn to perform.
When you’ve solicited volunteers, you need a plan.
Volunteers like helping. They like being useful. They like following directions. They like to contribute.
Showing up is a way of saying, “I’m here. I’m ready. Tell me what to do.”
Volunteers who haven’t been given direction are frustrated volunteers.
Don’t be afraid to delegate. And since you can’t delegate without a plan, start with the plan.
What does it look like when someone’s working?
Sitting at a desk?
Reading a book?
Talking to a co-worker?
Squinting at a spreadsheet?
Moving physical objects?
Staring out a window?
Answering the phone?
Replying to an email?
Any one of these tasks could be actual work. But not necessarily. The point is, sometimes the important work doesn’t really look like work. And sometimes busy-looking people aren’t actually working.
You don’t dive into the shallow end; that’s a perilous thing to do. You go where it’s deep. Where you can be fully immersed.
So it is with what you read, and the conversations you have. Diving into the shallow stuff is asking for trouble.
Wade into the shoals if you’d like… but when it’s time to dive, do it where there’s depth.
There’s always a viral news story. Always.
Whether we follow its every detail is up to us. We get to choose.
For those times when we lose focus... when we forget the importance of the work we do and the change we seek to make... those viral news stories welcome us with open arms and a rabbit hole of hyperlinks.
We have to remember: reading the news can inform the work, but reading the news is not the work.
The thought, “I’ve never had to deal with this before,” can be paralyzing.
And yet, we find a way. We always find a way.
I’ve read that Buddhist master Chögyam Trungpa Rinpoche once said, “The bad news is you’re falling through the air, nothing to hang on to, no parachute. The good news is, there’s no ground.”
* * *
May we learn to navigate the winds gracefully, knowing that whatever we face — sunrise or sunset — we’ll find a way. We will learn, we will grow, and with each moment, the beauty of our own story will continue to unfold.
Better to show up to the meeting on time, without your coffee... than to show up late with a steaming cup of java.
No one is particularly concerned about your caffeine intake. They care that you show up on time.
It’s like you’re at the school dance. Or the playground. Sometimes, kind souls will see you on the sidelines and invite you in. They’ll say, “Come. Come play. Come dance.” But many times, no one extends that invitation. They might not even see you at all (so it would seem).
If you so choose, you can stand on the side until it’s time to go home.
But we’re not meant to do that. We’re not created to watch idly. We’re made to dance and to play. Even if we have to invite ourselves in.
Don’t waste this moment. Don’t wait in anticipation of that kind invitation. Shake off your hesitation, and be alive. Enter the game. And if you want... you can be that kind soul. Look to the sidelines. There are always people waiting there.
Does your word carry weight? That is, when you say, “I'll take care of it,” how truthful is the statement?
Do you mean that the job will be done in a reasonable time-frame?
Or that after months of delay, you’ll finally get around to it?
Or that it will get done only after you’ve been reminded multiple times?
If it’s anything but the first scenario, don’t be surprised when people aren’t eager to hear you say, “I’ll take care of it.”
There’s a tipping point where things can start to go wrong. One too many errors, one too many occupants, one too many violations, one too many drinks...
It’s a mistake, however, to worry about “one too many” when considering acts of kindness, generosity, mercy, and forgiveness. Don’t hold back.
Standing on a soap box might help you to be heard in a crowd. But if your soap box gets to be too tall — we’re being literal with the metaphor here — you’ll lose touch with the people you seek to reach. They won’t be able to hear you, and you won’t be able to hear them. Eventually, people will forget you’re way up there on that soap box, and they’ll just walk away.
When you can’t hear the encouragement…
When you can’t see the supporters…
When you think they’ve forgotten about you…
It could be that you’re running a marathon. That your journey takes you along paths where there’s no place for spectators.
And that soon — any moment now — you’ll turn another corner and see them. You’ll hear the cheering. You’ll feel their love for you, and you’ll realize that they’ve been rooting for you the whole time... even from afar.
